Out of the darkness comes the wait. The wait is where it all takes place.
~Hilarion
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Our dark side is our inner personal self—the self that eludes our full awareness. C. J. Jung called it our shadow. Others may think of it as our subconscious mind. It a creative and fertile inner space, in which our logical conscious mind does not have full control. It is a place of mystery and confusion, inspiration and cross purposes. It is random, powerful and imbued with separation consciousness, as it is part of our physical mind.
Our inner darkness perceives life through separation consciousness, but from a perspective outside of logic. Emotions are often in charge, and habits and thought patterns are formed based on our emotional reactions to life events. This is the place in which we store many of our beliefs about our own and the world’s imperfection. We believe that we and our existence could and should be better. If only “X” were true or real, we would be happy. The world would be a better place, if only “Y” might occur. This leads us to wait for circumstances to be different, before we allow ourselves to enjoy life. We are always waiting for something or someone (sometimes ourselves) to change. This is the wait, born of our inner darkness.
The wait is the home of the hell of comparisons. It creates what we see as both the beauty and the ugliness of our third dimensional world. It spurs us to creative action as well as dissatisfaction. We may be emotionally inspired to write, sculpt, or cook something. Or we may lose ourselves in repetitive patterns of old emotional reactions. But the wait is the fertile ground that, whether we understand it or not, is the starting point for most events in our lives. Most of our reality is created based on often unrecognized beliefs that live in the wait.
Left to its own devices, the wait does not bring us happiness. We may believe that things born of the wait will make us happy but they never seem to, because there is always another comparative or another lack. We always seem to need or want something more or different. Achieving one goal leaves us waiting for another. We feel perpetually wounded or incomplete.
We need an additional perspective to help us use the best aspects of the wait, so we can be happy in the moment. We need input from a source that understands the essential divinity and perfection of everything and everyone, as is. We need help from our sharing within—the seat of our personal divinity.
Let’s take a few minutes to connect consciously with our sharing within and explore our inner darkness—our wait—with the illumination of divine perspective. We’ll begin by breathing softly, gently, and evenly, as we picture our sharing within as a golden light in the center of our chest. As we inhale, our light grows bright and solid; as we exhale, the golden light flows out through our body and surroundings. We’ll continue breathing the golden light until we feel relaxed, calm, peaceful, and certain. This is our signal that we’ve made conscious connection with our sharing within.
Now we will ask our sharing within to accompany us on a journey into our wait. We’ll ask to be shown the single most painful and damaging belief we hold in our inner darkness. Perhaps we feel essentially inadequate because we could not cope with or control a challenging event in childhood. Perhaps we’ve always judged ourselves as lacking or broken as a result. Whatever we’re shown, we’ll know that divinity surrounds and infuses us, and that we have all the help we need to recognize this difficult truth.
We will ask our sharing within to show us two ways in which this belief influences and creates our present life circumstances. Perhaps we sabotage current opportunities because we’re afraid to fail, thus showing ourselves to be even more inadequate. Perhaps we try to please everyone so that they won’t find us lacking, but end up pleasing no one, not even ourselves. Whatever we see, we will allow divine compassion to flow through us in waves of golden light from our sharing within, and we will view our behaviors and beliefs neutrally.
We will give ourselves permission to let go of the difficult belief and will picture golden light dissolving it. We’ll ask our sharing within to give us a new belief, one that honors our divine nature. Perhaps we will be given the gift of knowing absolutely that we share inherent perfection with all of creation. We will request an affirmation to ground that new belief within us. “We are born of perfect love. All the events in our lives reflect this essential truth.”
We also will ask our sharing within to show us how to create a tangible expression of our new belief, one that we will enjoy. Perhaps we’ll be asked to draw a picture, or dance our joy, or write a poem. Perhaps we’ll share our realization in a long chat with another. Whatever we are shown, we’ll make a commitment to ourselves to make our belief concrete through joyful action.
Finally, we’ll thank our sharing within for casting light into the darkness. When we are consciously together with our sharing within, there is no need to wait. Life is beautiful now.
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Divinely unique and beautiful reader, how are you willing to stop waiting? Please share…