Take another look (and breathe)
Sometimes we size up a situation immediately. We get a first impression and say to ourselves, “Yup. I know exactly what this is.”
Sometimes our immediate take on the scenario is accurate. But just as often, if not more, it isn’t.
We’re usually basing our evaluation on our past experience, which may have been negative. Any perceived similarity between then and now can cause us to assume that they are the same. Based on this comparison, we can have a knee-jerk reaction in the present.
We can circumvent this tendency by consciously hitting the pause button on our reaction. When we feel our emotions going from zero to sixty, just like that, we can recognize what’s happening and decide to take a step back mentally and emotionally. Then from a place of greater neutrality, we can sort through whether the present scenario is actually what we fear it might be.
Note the word fear. That emotion is an important component of our lightning quick reaction. Even if what we believe we’re experiencing is anger, it likely is the sauce on a serving of fear.
If we can identify what we’re afraid of, or at the very least recognize that fear is driving our reaction, we can break free from the emotional pattern. We can choose how we wish to react in the now.
Today’s message reminds me that reviewing my options before choosing, acting, or speaking is seldom a mistake. When I ponder a bit first, I’m more likely to act in concert with my values and to my benefit.
Please reflect and share. How often do you have knee jerk reactions? Is there usually a common cause?